Thursday, June 28, 2012

It's Ok/Thankful Thursday

While thinking about everything going on right now, I thought linking up with Neely would be a great way to remind myself that no matter what is going on, and how stressed and overwhelmed I might get, there is always good somewhere!

It's OK.....
-that some nights when I can't sleep, I watch Desperate Housewives reruns on Netflix.  They're always good for a good laugh
-to eat a couple small pieces of chocolate when it's been one of those days!  (I ran them off later I don't feel quite so guilty)
-that anytime Easton whines in his sleep, I keep my fingers crossed that he won't wake up.  I just want one week to sleep through the night.  Is that too much to ask for?!?!
-I'm so excited to see "Magic Mike" with some girlfriends!  I may have been counting down the days for the past week or so...
-that I watch "Coming Home" on Lifetime and ball my eyes out every week.  I need that to remind me what comes at the end of this deployment, and what is only a couple of months away for me.

Thankful for....
-my husband being safe.  Today marks FIVE months since he's left, and I am so thankful everyday that he is safe and the people from his battalion that he is stationed with are safe, too.
-another month down in the deployment book!  Each day we get closer!!  And now we are almost under the  two month mark!!!!!
-a healthy child.  Even if we have power struggles, temper tantrums, and meltdowns, Easton is happy and healthy.
-a great family.  We have been staying with my family since J left, and even though it was hard moving in, they have been so much help and provided so much support.  It will be bittersweet to leave once Josh gets home.  We will be so happy to have Josh home, but I will miss being so close to family.  12 hours is hard....


I apologize for this blog post, but it's been one of THOSE weeks.  It's never seemed to end!
This week has truly tested me in so many ways.
First, school.  I wanted to take summer classes this summer to lighten my load for the fall.  After the spring semester, I lacked 5 courses to graduate.  Well, this fall, I knew we would be moving, welcoming Josh back home, getting settled in, etc, etc, etc that I wouldn't have time to tackle five courses.  So, I decided to take two this summer.  While I know in the long run, it will be beneficial, it has drained me.
I've also been feeling like I'm not good enough as a mom. I know this might sound crazy, but as a single parent (for now) I feel like any time Easton has a meltdown or a temper tantrum, it is a reflection on me as a mother.  We are in the midst of a power struggle.  Easton is only 13.5 months, but he tries to act so much older.  He's been walking for upwards of three months now, so of course he's into everything.  This week, he has decided he doesn't want to take his afternoon nap.  Today, I decided that we would start the transition of only one longer nap a day.  I planned on laying him down somewhere between 11-12, but at 10, he was ready for a nap.  When his normal 2pm afternoon nap rolled around, I laid him down, and he played for two hours.  By 6pm, he's done.  He's ready to go to bed, but if he goes that early, he would be up at 3am.  I keep him up, but it's a struggle.  He has also developed the temper of a two year old.  He is so hard headed, strong willed, and stubborn.  If he doesn't get his way, we have a throwing head back, wallering on the floor meltdown.  It's bad.  I feel like anytime this happens, I look like a horrible mom because I can't instantly make him stop.  Anytime J and I would go out before we had kids, I always said I wouldn't be THAT mom who has kids laying on the floor crying because they don't get their way.  But, I have eaten those words, and tonight, while eating dinner out at a local restaurant, I became that mom.  It got so bad, we finally had to leave.  Needless to say, I am ready to have both Mom and Dad back.  Then, maybe Josh and I can double team him and win.....At least I can keep telling myself that, right?!
Easton also has become the world's pickiest eater.  He eats two things.  Chicken and Yogurt.  For the first year of Easton's life, I was extremely strict about what he ate.  We tried to restrict him to mostly natural foods, organic if possible.  We tried not to feed many processed foods, and if possible, most foods we could, we got fresh.  Josh and I are both extremely vigilant in our diets, and while we know we can't completely restrict E from certain foods, we wanted him to grow up eating healthy foods (yes, I'm THAT mom).  He discovered chicken nuggets, and it was over.  That's all the wants.  Every meal.  I have tried multiple other things, but chicken is it.  If my child starts clucking around, I think I will know why.
I am really ready for the weekend.  A baby shower I am helping to throw is Sunday.  Maybe I will make it till then :)  

Saturday, June 16, 2012


Today, I was trying to think of some cute ideas for something special for Josh for Father's Day.  We sent him some gifts over last week, and they got to Afghanistan in record time, so I wanted to do a little something special on the actual day.  I thought for a while, then finally came up with the idea of doing a PhotoStory over the course of Easton's life. 
From their first pictures together,

To one last pictures before Josh left,

To our most recent "family" picture on Easton's First Birthday.

While looking back over all of these pictures, I started thinking back to life over Easton's first year.  When Easton was first born, Josh was stationed in DC completing a duty station with the Ceremonial Guard.  After we got married, he was "suppose" to only have 11 months left in DC, therefore, we opted not to get housing and we would just see each other on the weekends.  For the first EIGHT weeks of Easton's life, that's how it worked.  I stayed with Easton 5 days by myself during the week, then Josh would drive home on Friday night and leave back for DC on Sunday night.  I remember when Josh left that first weekend, I didn't know how I would make it until he came back home.  Here I was, a single mom for 5 days/nights, and it scared me so bad!  At the time, I thought this was the hardest thing in the world.  When Easton turned Eight weeks old, Josh left for A-School in Mississippi, we knew that we probably wouldn't see each other for eight weeks.  EIGHT WHOLE WEEKS BY MYSELF.  When faced with this, I didn't know how I would make it.  But somehow, we pulled through, and when Easton was four months old, we moved to Mississippi to FINALLY be a family!  While the joy was short lived, it was the best FIVE months I could have ever asked for.  While in Mississippi, Josh left for field exercises for two-four weeks.  Again, when faced with this, I didn't know how we would make it.  Here I was in this new city, and the only person I really knew was leaving me.  I didn't know what I would do to pass the time, outside of school work, and I wasn't sure how I would have time to get all my work done.  I remember calling my mom days during that first week, in tears not knowing how I would make it 10 more days.  10 days... REALLY??  I was crying over that?  Ha!  And before this deployment, I remember thinking the same things.  How in the world would we make it 8 months.  How would we stay connected/close?  Would we be able to talk?  Tons of questions and worry went through my mind.  I didn't know how Easton and I would make it that long on our own.  But today, I am proud to say we have made it TWENTY WEEKS by ourselves!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Twenty WHOLE weeks!!  Crazy!  I can't say every step has been easy, but we have made it!  Our weeks left are quickly dwindling and I am starting to see that light at the end of the tunnel!  We are going to make it through this!!  Not only are we going to have made it through this, but we are going to make it through this with flying colors!!!!  Josh and I are stronger than ever.  With communication skills limited, you learn to connect of different levels.  Our ways of communicating have improved two fold.  While I know we aren't done yet, I look back, and I can't help but be proud of how far we have come.  I was the girl that couldn't go one single day without crying because my husband wasn't home to going days without it bothering me.  Don't get me wrong, we still miss him and hurt that he's not here all the same, but we have grown stronger.  I never realized I could be strong enough to make it through this, but it's always amazing how far you can go when you have to!  Can't wait to celebrate Father's Day tomorrow!  Can't wait to enjoy the day with my Daddy and my grandfather!  But it's bittersweet!  I wish my son could celebrate with his father!  I wish I could show my husband how great of a Daddy he is!  Please remember those people, those fathers who are not with their families this day!  Being deployed is never easy, and it gets hard on days like this. 
Happy Father's Day to You, Josh!  We can't wait to celebrate YOU when you get home!  

Monday, June 11, 2012

Sunday, Randomness, and the Countdown Begins

Well, another week has begun!  Yesterday was a typical Sunday at our house!  We tried to go to church.  Yes, we TIRED.  Our church here only has one service which starts at 10:00am.  In a normal day, Easton naps from 10-12.  So on Sundays, I try and let him sleep a little bit later in hopes that he could make it until about 11:30 before he is ready for a nap.  The past two Sundays, we have gotten to church and by 10:30, we have had to leave because Easton is in full meltdown mode wanting his nap!  But, coming home early, did give us one advantage....I got to skype with Josh! 

There is no greater feeling than to get to skype with Josh.  Just getting to talk to him, see him, and know he is safe is wonderful!  While Skype has been AMAZING throughout his deployment, we both agreed that after he got home, we didn't really want to use skype for a couple months.

Yesterday, I also spent time working on some more baby shower crafts.  I am one of these people who can decorate/design things very well, but when it comes to actually making them, let's just say....I am HORRIBLE.  I can have great visions, but I suck when it comes to the actual craft part of it.  So, while planning SaraBeth's baby shower, I had a vision of what I wanted it to look like.  Luckily most parts are coming along nicely. 

We are making a banner with her initials "KTB" for the present table.  We decided to use the colors for their room, a light green, with accents of pink, so that any of the decorations from the shower could be used in the nursery. 

We are also using wall letters to be the center of the food table.  We are getting a couple pink flowers to put behind the letters, and will then put the food around it. 

In between painting letters and tracing and cutting, Easton and I had plenty of fun together. 

In the past couple weeks, he seems as if he has grown up so much!  I think back and he was eight months old when Josh left, and when Josh comes home, he will be pushing 16 months.  I know they are going to have so much fun playing when he gets home.  I can't tell you who I think is more excited!
Easton has always been so active that I rarely ever get the chance to cuddle him anymore, but yesterday, after he woke up from his nap, he just sat in my lap and laid for a couple minutes. 

Had to mark the rare occasion with some pictures!

Finally, this weekend Easton and I finally made Josh's countdown chain.  I do so bad with countdowns.  Especially when they are long!  I had been holding out on doing a countdown for a while, but after we crossed a milestone last week, I finally decided we would make ours. 

(I wish I could say this is how many days Josh was from home, but sadly it is not...this was about halfway or so through making it.  But at least it is getting closer everday :)!!!)

I am really bad at getting so focused on the end and where we are going that I don't enjoy the journey there.  I was telling Josh that I have been so focused on him getting home that I feel like I don't enjoy the day-to-day stuff we have going on here, so in connection with our countdown, I decided to do something different with it.  Instead of simply pulling off the link for that day and throwing it away, we are going to be saving it and writing some of our memories or something special that happened that day. This way, we take time to enjoy life right now, while also counting down until Josh is home!  Well, I'm done rambling for the day.  I've got laundry to get caught up on, a marketing project that needs some attention, and a baby that refuses to nap!  Happy MONDAY :)

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Sunday Social

Happy Sunday, Y'all!  Today, I am linking up with Ashley on their Sunday Socail Post! 

So, here are my answers to this weeks questions!

1. How did you come up with your blog name?
My blog name was pretty simple to come up with.  Being a Navy Wife, life is constantly changing.  Whether dealing with a deployment, long work hours, field training, the list could go on and on, life is never the from one day to another.  Add on to the fact that I have an extremely active 13 month old, and life is NEVER boring at our house!

2. What is your favorite thing about blogging?
Overall, I think my favorite thing is just the ability that it gives me to "journal" our life right now.  There is so much going on, that I want to get everything documented, but some days it is just hard to sit down and write it all down.  I tried to scrapbook for a while, but for me, that just showed the bigger events, and blogging allows me to capture the "everday" of our lives.

3. What is one thing you have discovered because of blogging and now cannot live without?
I have discovered multiple "sale" sites such as Tosty, Zulily, etc.  I had never heard of sites like that before, but after seeing multiple people blog about them and the deals they were receiving, I couldn't help but check them out, and now, I love looking and shopping on them daily!

4. Facebook or Twitter?  And why?
I am kind of split on this one.  I am still fairly new to Twitter, so I am still discovering things about it, but I really like Twitter.  However, my husband is not on the Twitter bandwagon, so for picture purposes, I like Facebook.  While using the computer in the MWR during deployment, they are not allowed to download pictures, so the best way to get Josh picture of Easton is via Facebook, so that wins for that reason :)

5. If one celebrity read your blog, who would you want it to be?
Jessica Alba.  Love her :)

6. What is something you want people to know about your blog?
My blog is extremely real and 100% me!  Right now, there are times when I have good days and days when I am just down and missing my husband.  I don't try and be one person via a blog and another person in real life.  Like my "Rant" post last night, I lay thing out pretty straight forward, but when I look back, I enjoy remembering how far I have come, how much stronger I have become, and soon, cannot wait to blog about how wonderful life is when Josh back home :)

Saturday, June 9, 2012


Happy Saturday, Y'all!  Saturdays for us are really no different than any other day of the week right now.  Josh isn't home to be off with us on the weekend, my family may or may not be in town due to my brother's basketball and baseball schedules, and I have homework/classwork no matter what day of the week it is, so we really had a pretty quiet day. 
I apologize for the following post, but there are just somethings I need to vent about, and what better place to do it then here :) 
We ran out to get gas tonight, and while out, I ran into a person who knew me and knew that Josh was gone.  She proceeded to ask me how everything was going (which was normal), asked me how long Josh had been gone, and then asked how much longer he had left.  (It should be noted we are well over halfway done at this point.  Not to give out too much sensitive information, but we are over 60% a good chunk is out of the way!)  When I told her how much longer, she responded, "Oh lord, I don't know how you will make it that much longer, I would die...."  I really wasn't sure how to respond.  Trying to think on my toes, I quickly just told her that after how long we have already gone with J gone, this would seem like nothing.  But her comment got me thinking how many random comments I get on a weekly basis about Josh's deployment. 
Just to highlight a few:
I constantly get asked if I enjoy Josh being gone.
This truly was one question I never really thought I would get.  Now, people who know me, know I am a whitty and very sarcastic person.  Whenever I have gotten this comment, I fight the urge to simply say, "Oh yes, I love being by myself all the time, being a single parent, going to bed by myself, the list could go on and on..." 

Another comment I get frequently is that once Josh gets home, after about a month, I will be ready to send him back. 
First of all, this is never something I wanted to do.  Even when Josh and I will have our moments where little things annoy us, I would never, EVER imagine wanting to send him back.  I can completely understand that once he gets home, we will go through a sort of "honeymoon" phase and shortly there after, things will calm down and settle into our normal.  But until you have to deal with an actual deployment, you can never imagine how hard it is.  There's not a day that I don't go by that I don't worry about him.  Anytime I hear any news coming out of Afghanistan, my heart drops.  This is something that I would NEVER want to go through, that's not saying that after he has been home a couple months, we might not need a couple days apart every now and then, but never another deployment. 

My least favorite comment I have gotten is, "Oh, well you knew what you were signing up should have known what to expect from marrying a military guy..."
Yes, when Josh and I met, he was already in the military, and yes, I knew the likelihood of him deploying was there.  But never, until you have been there, do you know what to expect from a deployment.  Everyone has different experiences.  Everyone deals with deployments in different ways.  I had no clue what to expect.  Those first days, I just remember crying and crying over every little thing.  No one can explain how much you will miss them.  Preparing for a deployment, you can think you know what is coming, but until they actually leave, until you have settled into a new normal, you could never understand how much it hurts.  Each day gets a little bit easier, but yet, each day still has its struggles.  No one can explain the worry, the fear, the hurt that you will experience over the months that they are gone. 

Sorry, don't mean to overload, or seem overly sensitive, but a deployment is hard.  I understand that people do try and be empathetic, but sometimes, people just don't think before they speak.  I saw a thing on pinterest that I felt like could describe all spouses with a deployed spouse, and it said, beware...wife going through deployment, approach with caution, and today, I have truly felt like that was me :)

Friday, June 8, 2012

The Trick is to Keep Breathing

Some days, I feel as if I rarely have time to catch my breath around here.  If it isn't dealing with school work, it is Easton, or Josh needs something to be mailed out asap so that he can get any parent, I feel like I never have the opportunity to just sit back and catch my breath.  Easton is going through spells where he doesn't want to sleep, so we have some days he just "plays in his crib" during nap time.  It WILL get better, it WILL get better (I keep telling myself this in order to convince myself that it will!)
On the deployment front, we have crossed another milestone.  Actually several since the last time I blogged.  I can officially say that we have made it "OVER THE HUMP," or in common terms, we are over halfway done with this deployment!!!!  YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  While I can't say exactly how much longer he has, each day is one day closer to him being home, and I am sooooooo ready!!! 
As if celebrating a halfway point in the deployment wasn't exciting enough, the halfway point also fell on mine and Josh's TWO year anniversary!  I cannot believe we have already been married two years, but looking back, I cannot believe how much has happened in those two years...a baby, a move to Mississippi, together 5 months, a deployment, a move back to NC for the deployment, and soon, we will be packing up again!  We cannot wait for J to get home and just have a calm couple months (if that's possible!)
I have started summer classes, so for 8 weeks, they will consume my life again, but after next semester, I will be DONE!!!!!!!!!!!! 
Easton is as wide open as ever!  He has been walking for over two months now, and he thinks he is big stuff. 

He is a complete ham, and he knows it, too!  He loves any and every bit of attention he can get!  
E LOVES basketball, which is good considering our family is a sports-oriented family!  He loves to watch his Uncle Scott shoot basketball outside, and if S leaves the ball on the ground for a second, you better believe that East runs over and picks it up and tries to shoot it on the big goal. 

Easton also LOVES skyping with Josh.  As soon as he sees that the computer is open, he runs up to it yelling "Dada, Dada, Dada," so I know one little boy who will be so excited when "Dada" is finally here in person! 
With the WARM weather that we have been having, we have taken full advantage of our pool on the deck!  East loves to play and splash in it, and it is a great way to burn off some energy! 

In between everything else going on, me and a dear friend, Kelly, are planning a baby shower for our friend, Sara Beth.  Sara Beth is due with her second little girl at the beginning of August.  (We are betting she won't make it past mid-July, however)!  Her first little girl, Kayson, will be TWO in August, so this shower is a simple "sprinkle/diaper shower," but we still wanted to make it festive, cute, and oh so girly!  I can't wait to share pictures of some of our stuff coming together.  Having a little boy, it is so nice to see some pink every now and then!